You eat out the middle.
-- Katie Duratti
Decks used:
Everyone remaining in the end quit because of how infinite Mike made the game. Two newer people joined (Nicole and Katie) and Thomas came back for more. Overall, this was decided to be a boring game for all but Mike.
Thomas won the first turn choice, and decided to go first. After his turn, however, he didn't want Mike to go next because, he figured, the longer it takes to get to Mike the more of a possibility the rest have to kill Mike. So, he told Nate to go instead, causing a counter-clockwise rotation.
First turn cards: Thomas played a Swamp, Nate an Island, Pat a Plains, Jae a Mountain, and Nicole an Island. Katie put out a Plains, then cast Confessor. Mike played Brushland and Shield Sphere.
Thomas played an Island. Nate put out a Tainted Field and told Pat to go. Pat played Forest followed by Marble Diamond. Jae put into play another Mountain then Disintegrated Katie's Confessor. Nicole played Plains then cast Soul Net. Katie played another Plains and Confessor. Brushland was put into play by Mike.
Thomas put out a Swamp to cast Rain of Tears on Katie's untapped Plains.
A Swamp was played by Nate, which he then used to cast Meddling Mage, declaring Worry Beads. Mike grumbled, Jae complained about the target card, and everyone else was rather indifferent.
Pat played a Forest and Karma. The word "karma" caused complaints by Katie, who was growing sick of the word. Mike then pointed out that his "Karma ran over your Dogma", which caused the movie Dogma to be discussed.
Jae did his traditional Mountain, followed by a ritual Braidwood Cup, which he immediately tapped to gain one life.
Nicole played Ornithopter and Altar of Dementia. Katie played a Forest. Mike played Brushland to cast Phyrexian Altar.
Thomas took two damage thanks to Pat's Karma. He played a Mountain and Active Volcano. This mostly hurt himself.
Nate cast Hypnotic Cloud, causing Pat to discard a Rushwood Grove. Pat took his turn, casting Wild Growth on a Forest he controlled.
Jae played a Mountain again, tapped the Cup for one life, and Disintegrated Nate's Meddling Mage. Nicole did nothing and Katie played a Forest.
Mike cast Ornithopter, tapped his Brushland for one white (taking a damage in the process), sacrificed his Ornithopter to Phyrexian Altar for another white, played Enduring Renewal and another Ornithopter. Then, he sacrificed this Ornithopter to Phryexian Altar enough times to cast Ashnod's Altar, Worry Beads, and Foster.
Thomas lost a Forest thanks to Worry beads, and he also lost two life because of Karma. All he did was cast Flowstone Flood on Mike's Brushland — not a useful idea.
Nate played Bog Down on Pat, making his discard Serra's Embrace and Plains. He lost a Swamp during his upkeep.
Pat lost Gallantry for his upkeep, then cast Renewal on his Forest to bring out a Plains.
Jae couldn't get his Lightning Bolt, with credit going to Worry Beads. So, he Shattered Worry Beads, then Incinerated Mike. Finally, he tapped his Cup for one life. Again, Nicole did nothing.
Katie played Plains and Simplify. Mike sacrificed his Foster and Pat his Karma. Mike then took his turn and Stream of Lifed off to infinity.
Thomas cast Earth Elemental after playing a Plains. Nate played Sandstone Needle and Pat Forest.
Jae tapped his Cup, then Lightning Bolted Nate. He also attempted to Disintegrate Mike's Ornithopter, but it disappeared before it could be touched. Mike took one damage from the resulting mana burn. Nicole played a Plains.
Katie played Forest, then attacked Nate with the Confessor. Nate took the one. Mike played his Ornithopter during his turn.
Thomas cast Amulet of Unmaking, then attacked Pat using his Earth Elemental. Pat took the four damage.
Nate cast Sudden Impact on Nicole, who had seven cards in her hand. Pat played nothing.
Jae played a Mountain, then Fireballed Nate for four.
Nicole did nothing but discard Stasis. Thanks to Confessor, Katie gained a life from this. Katie also played a Forest, enchanted it with Squirrel Nest, tapped it to produce a Squirrel, then attacked Thomas with the Confessor. Thomas took the one.
Mike simply discarded Shield Sphere due to Enduring Renewal.
Thomas cast Fire Elemental, then declared his attack with Earth Elemental on Katie. She blocked using a Squirrel token.
Nate played Megrim. Pat played Plains. Jae tapped his Cup for one life.
Krista Johnston stepped in for Nicole here because Nicole had to leave. She played a Plains, then Phyrexian Altar. She sacrificed Ornithopter to the Altar to cast Careful Study, discarding Gaea's Blessing and Phyrexian Altar. That's it.
Katie also played Plains, followed by Hallowed Healer. She attacked Pat with a Confessor; Pat took the one. Mike did nothing.
Thomas attacked Pat with his Earth Elemental; Pat took the one damage.
Nate played Thalakos Lowlands, followed by Balshan Beguiler. Pat played Plains.
Jae yelled "Whoo hoo!", then played Talruum Champion. He tapped the Cup for a life, then told Krista to go.
Krista played Island, then Jester's Cap to screw Mike over.
Katie played Plains. She then attacked Pat with a Squirrel, Confessor, and Hallowed Healer; Pat took the three. Finally, she tapped the Squirrel Nest to put a token into play. Mike simply played Altar of Dementia.
Thomas sacrificed Amulet of Unmaking to remove Mike's Phyrexian Altar. Too little, too late.
Other players saw how the game would end; Katie left, claiming that she had to be someplace. Pat mana burned himself for ten, killing himself.
Nate attempted to save the day; he cast Meddling Mage to stop future Enduring Renewals.
Jae decided to go out with a bang: two Giant Strengths on the Talruum Champion, tap the Cup, and attack Thomas with the Champion. Thomas took all seven damage.
Everyone except Mike quit the game. Oh well.
Mike Burns <mike@mike-burns.com>